He was the very definition of a total drip. 

Chelsea, NYC. 

Penis Man approached the weekend like he approached life, with open arms. A result of the fact that he was both a cool customer and couldn't close his arms.

Soho, NYC. 

The sidewalk and me, two New Yorkers who started the day thinking, "F this." 

Flatiron, NYC. 

And then the universe provided actual evidence that she was, in fact, a ton of bricks.

Chelsea, NYC.