I’m Calling It: The People vs. O.J. Simpson is the Greatest Miniseries Ever (Sorry Roots)

Not since the early nineties heyday of the salacious television miniseries has a made-for-TV movie been as addictive as FX’s The People vs. O.J. Simpson. Yes, The People vs. O.J. Simpson harkens back to a time when networks were bursting at the seams to broadcast the tawdry, over-dramatized tales of Danielle Steel and Jackie Collins, and we were loving every minute of it. I mean, Nicolette Sheridan as Lucky Santangelo, how could we not?

They were the glory days (never mind that some of us weren’t even old enough to drive), but somewhere between the rise of technology and the attention span of reality television, our beloved cheesy miniseries faded away. And millions of silent tears were shed in wall-to-wall carpeted living rooms across the country.

There would be three-night movie events here and there as the years rolled on, but they were generally on networks like Lifetime, which saturated the airwaves with programming that was more afterschool special than escapist pleasure. Dallas was off the air, Dynasty was gone, Falcon Crest had dropped off the face of the planet. Where else were we to turn than the Real Housewives of Fill in the Blank that would eventually take their places?

Well, there is something called reading.

And so it was with great fanfare that The People vs. O.J. Simpson began its marketing campaign, betting not only on our desperation for something spicy yet familiar, but wagering that today’s viewers would be in the sweet spot between curiosity and hazy recall. Which is to say that, in the golden age of paparazzi, we are as curious as ever about the ugly side of celebrity and twenty-two years later, we might not remember enough of the gory details to turn us away.

They wagered correctly as over twelve million of us tuned in for the first installment. The number one reason why The People vs. O.J. Simpson is so goddamn good is the cast. It’s unbelievable that they were able to get so many big name actors given the tabloid nature of the story. David Schwimmer stars as Robert Kardashian, a character infinitely more interesting since the rise of the Kardashians than he was in 1994. John Travolta is Robert Shapiro and it’s the first time I’ve been able to take him seriously in decades. Cuba Gooding Jr.—taking one for the team as O.J. himself—is so good you almost think O.J. really believes he didn’t do it. Almost. In perhaps the best casting move ever, Connie Britton (“Texas Forever!”) plays Faye Resnick, in all her coked-up, vivacious outfit glory. And Nathan Lane as F. Lee Bailey? What genius even thought that up?

But the man who shines brighter than the satin pajamas and purple silk suits he rocks through Beverly Hills is Courtney B. Vance as Johnnie Cochran. Once he joins the Dream Team there is no question as to why O.J. got off. As Johnnie says, “It’s like it’s my destiny.”

His destiny may have also been to be an extra in Troop Beverly Hills, but that one was never fulfilled.

As the story plays out on screen, you literally can’t look away. For, if you do, you might miss a gratuitous shot of the young Kardashian kids screaming as their father addresses the media. Marcia Clarke, Judge Ito, Kato Kaelin, the courtroom; all of it is exactly as you remember, only you’re on the inside now, seeing the human Marcia at home with her kids, Judge Ito proudly showing off a fan letter from Arsenio Hall, Kato lamenting that he has to move out of Simpson’s guest house while getting flashed from some “fans” driving by. It’s surreal. This week brought the welcome addition of Dominick Dunne to the courtroom, followed by him gossiping like a cad at a dinner party about what he’d seen.

All amusement aside, there is a bigger force at play here, one which drives the series. Should we have forgotten any of the aforementioned gory details, The People vs. O.J. Simpson assaults us with them from the first minute, as it absolutely should. Because for all the reasons this is a ridiculously entertaining television movie, it is an equally startling tale of overwhelming guilt in a horrific crime. One whose lack of justice for the victims should never have been allowed to take the sad turns it did. The entire program serves to not only remind us, but drill into the brains of every last one of us who may still be harboring any shred of doubt, that O.J. unequivocally, brutally murdered two people with full knowledge of what he was doing.

For that reason alone, it could be considered the greatest miniseries of all time.

And no, when I refer to The People vs. O.J. Simpson as the greatest miniseries of all time, I am not putting it in the category of War and Peace or documentary masterpieces by Ken Burns, or those the likes of American Experience—this is Ridiculous in the City you are reading. Is it a true crime story? Yes. Is it entertaining? Yes. But the category it belongs in is that of voyeuristic guilty pleasure, even though I don’t feel the least bit guilty about watching it. It is an absurdly interesting portrait of something so unfathomable you can’t believe it actually happened, and it shows us, on the most rudimentary level, that the whole case was screwed from the get go. A truth that is saddest for the families of Nicole Brown and Ron Goldman as The People vs. O.J. Simpson constantly reminds us.

It’s hard not to see that what began as the public’s obsession with watching the O.J. trial laid the seeds of our current reality TV obsession. If that kind of massive charade could have happened with O.J. Simpson, a B-list celebrity in 1994, can you imagine what would happen today? E! would probably set up another channel and broadcast twenty-four hour dedicated programing, with episodes of Keeping Up With the Kardashians airing in prime time, of course.

The People vs. O.J. Simpson is not going to change the world, but once you’ve solved world hunger, put your feet up and witness the ridiculousness that is this epic miniseries. You can use a little more ridiculousness in your life, or at the very least, a little more Faye Resnick.

Now, can I get a made for TV movie about the making of Dynasty please? I’m dying here.

If joy and merriment are free, why am I feeling so broke and borderline psychotic?

Today, Ridiculous hits The Billfold once again: 

Back in early October when we began to be inundated with Christmas décor filling the shelves of retailers big and small, I laughed at the absurdity. Halloween was still weeks away, to say nothing of Thanksgiving. With that in mind I made a pledge to myself: take it one holiday at a time. Zen and the Art of Holidays. But as the holidays came and went, “one holiday at a time” became a challenge, both for my wallet and my mental state.

In an effort to prevent myself from yet another year of going off the deep end, I’m getting proactive and appealing to the 2016 holiday me, the one who I hope is sane, happy and has money in the bank. God, she looks good. Read full article: A Letter to My Holiday Self One Year From Now here...

There is nothing so ridiculous as the holidays.